I will be an adult in thirty nine minutes

I have so much to say.

It might take me an hour to write this all out. 

I don't know where to start to be honest. So much has happened since I last wrote. 

I'm in school now. Getting into the groove of school has been really hard. I wake up at 6:45 every morning, leave the house by 7:45 at the latest to drive in traffic to school, where I'm in class and on my feet from 8:30 to 3:00. After that, if it's a work day, I drive straight from school to work and I'm there until either 8 or 9.  That makes for a long day. I've found myself eating so much junk food and snacks and quick car food that I know I'm going to gain something like a Freshman 30 or somewhere around there.  And let me tell you, if that happens I will not be a happy camper.  I won't be a happy person, let alone a happy person sleeping in the woods in a tent. I don't understand that phrase to be honest. So far i've kept up with homework, gotten really good grades and i'm enjoying my classes immensely, but I don't know how long I can keep that up.  I think this work and school schedule is going to burn me out eventually and that is a scary thought.  I don't know what I'll do when I start feeling like I hate work and school and just want to be out of both.  I require a butt load of sleep and right now I've been getting like half a cheek's worth every night. (That example is courtesy of Oliver Toal) That isn't enough. 

I have a car. I have a license. I can drive wherever I want and almost whenever I want. It's pretty darn cool. I love feeling so independent. I feel so...wonderful I guess is the best way to put it, when I'm just driving along in my car singing Break Free, Boom Clap, or  Black Widow at the top of my lungs. Black Widow is so my jam right now. I can turn the music in my car as loud as I want and my parents aren't even in the car to turn down the song as soon as it gets to the chorus.

Just driving like...

I will be 18 tomorrow. I will be a legal adult. I will be able to drive anyone I want, I can drive after 11 PM, I can vote, I can sign my own papers, I can get a tattoo, I can do so much stuff. I can buy lotto tickets. But I WONT okay mom? Geez. What kind of a person do you think I am? lol Mainly i'm excited to be 18 because I hope that will make me seem a lot older in people's eyes. I feel like quite often people think of me as this little girl because I'm "so short and cute and adorable." I hate being that. I wish for once people would say I was pretty or a good friend or something, not just like the adorable little girl. That grates on my nerves. It Grates. 

Random things come out of my mind and I don't know how. It's kindof fun to think about what I think about. Does that make sense?

You know, that's really all I want to talk about tonight. I am tired of thinking. I want to go to sleep so I will wake up and it will be my birthday. Yep that's what I want to do. I hope you weren't too bored or confused by this post and I hope you freaking comment on it because I love when you do that. Kidding you don't have to. (But you still CANNNNN)

XO
Charlotte the birthday girl in thirty nine minutes

How to be cool and other shallow stuff

And thus eight days had passed since she added to her public assemblage of recorded thoughts. She was filled with remorse at the complete and utter lack of consistency on her part, and consequently agonized over the appropriate means of making amends. What, she reasoned, could she do to regain the confidence of those who made it their habit to read that which she wrote? Alas, nothing came promptly to mind, and so, in her state of internal turmoil and agitation, she moved on. 

I can not even tell you how much fun that was. But I am done. It must have been boring.

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Okay so to start out this post with a BANG, this video makes me laugh so hard I can't even explain it to you. Honestly I'm not sure why...it's my mood I suppose. 

So you know how you aren't supposed to be jealous? I man jealousy is a sin. So duh obviously we aren't supposed to do it. Well there are a few things I get very jealous of. 

1. When someone has a really nice car
2. Girls who are taller than me
3. "Cool" people AKA anyone I know

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Those might seem like stupid things to be jealous of (except the first one maybe) but hey, I do what I want. Not that I mean I want to be jealous...but you know what I mean.

Question of the day: What's something that every single person in the world thinks about every day whether they realize it or not?

Answer: What can I do/wear/say/fill-in-the-blank that would make me look cool?

Yeah don't even try to lie to me. Everyone EVERYONE wants to be cool, or thinks they're cool, or thinks about how to be cool. And before I go on, I have two things to say. 

• Don't read this and think I'm some shallow idiot like lots of people in this lame world of ours...there's nothing wrong with being cool. (USUALLY)
• When I say "cool" I'm assuming you know what i'm talking about, but just to clarify, I basically mean that you present yourself well and you have a good image and *ahem* you look good.

How freaking shallow and teenage girl-ish does that sound? Pretty darn. But remember, there isn't necessarily anything wrong with this and I write about what I think about so here you go. Judge if you want to Judge. (OR NOT. THERE'S ALWAYS THAT) 

You know those people who just try WAY WAY too hard to be cool? They wear like five hundred trendy pieces of clothing at once so you think they're rich? They try to use slang when they don't know what it means? They act like they're all that and a bag of chips...and everyone's like who is that kid? Yeah with those people I'm just like

 How to be Cool

These are just things that I find to be "cool" about other people

• First impressions are ALWAYS important. If you meet someone, don't be stupid about it.
•  Don't try too hard to impress people. For instance, if you're in a group and you're trying to get attention don't make idiot jokes at random times. That's so dumb.
• Be real. Always check yourself and make sure you aren't acting different than, well, you. It's so easy to get carried away and start acting differently around different people to fit in. If you're the exact same person as everyone else when you're around them...you won't be fun to hang out with honestly. 
• Put a little effort into what you wear. I mean sure, there's a time and a place for dressing down and wearing sweats (sweatpants are life) but even if you do, you aren't going to look super appealing to people around you if you literally look like you got out of bed that minute. 
• Don't think you're too good for stuff. Heck, I still play in the back yard with my sisters and I still bake cookies with friends when they come over and I talk to people who other jerks won't talk to (because let's be real...those are great people. If you don't want to talk to somebody because of how they look or talk...you are not being a nice person. Just sayin' it how it is.) You are ABSOLUTELY NOT too good to help out in the nursery, or do things that the popular kids don't do.
• Don't wear inappropriate stuff to get attention. You can be trendy without being trashy. Guys, if your jeans are tighter than mine, no. Just no. There's a fine like between guys' skinnies, and man leggings. 
• Be spontaneous and try new things. I hope that's pretty self-explanatory. 
• You don't need a boyfriend/girlfriend to be cool. Trust me. Please. 

I'm curious...do you agree/disagree with any or all of these things? I probably would if I were the one reading this (which makes no sense because I'm writing it myself so I obviously know what it says) But I don't know how to explain it. I think if you follow all of my rules for cool you're going to be an awesome person that everyone in their right mind will want to be friends with :) Notice I left out things like,

• Be nice
• Be yourself
• Be a good friend

Because those are lame. They just are. Like how many the heck times could you say "well duh!"

Everyone wants to be cool, and I'm not going to lie. Most people will think  you're cool mainly based off of your looks. I know that's super shallow and stupid but It's still really true. We can't deny that. But, I just want you to know, that if you don't buy all your clothes at American Eagle or H&M, and you don't have a different MK bag for every day of the week, there are  people (like me) who will think you're the coolest. All you have to do is present yourself in a positive way, like don't be a complainer, a gossiper or a liar, and you're automatically pretty dang cool. (Then the last step is to wear pants and a shirt that at least match people.)

Stay classy

XO

 

Make it or break it

So, to start off, today at work I slammed my finger in the cash register drawer. My left index finger. So typing right now is painful. You'd better be grateful for this blog post because I AM IN PAIN FOR YOUR ENTERTAINMENT HERE PEOPLE. But hey, I love you so it's okay. Don't feel tooooo guilty about reading this...(kidding. feel super guilty.)

Not 100% sure this gif fits...but I thought it was cute

 And moving on to my second mini-topic for this post:  To all of you who have heard me complain about work, and my co-workers, and my managers, (if you don't know I work at a grocery store as a cashier) I apologize. In all honesty, it's a little fun to complain because I feel better after. (Isn't that what people usually say DOESN'T happen?) Anyway, my job is pretty much perfect for me right now. I can take off basically whatever time I need, it's close to my house so I can walk to work if need be, some of the managers aren't bad and most of the co-workers are people with whom I can get along. BAM! NAILED THAT GRAMMAR 

I guess what i'm saying is, I should really not  complain as much as I do and to all of you to whom I have complained, I am sorry. 

 

 Can we all just agree right now that my grammar so far has been on point? Okay? Okay. (WHOA, THAT'S LIKE A TFIOS REFERENCE!)

And so we will be moving on to the real meat of this post. The thoughts and ideas in the following paragraphs will be mediocre at best, and I don't expect to get anything deep written down, but you know what? That's okay. I'm not a prize-winning writer so I can do what I want.

What would you consider to be make it or break it?

I know I have talked in the past about what I'm looking for in a guy, and I probably will again because that was in one of my first few posts. AKA probably nobody actually remembers it. (Okay okay, I really don't have any idea what I wrote about either.) So, today, and for the past few days, I have been thinking about what is a make it or break it thing for me. 

I'm going to give a short list of qualities that someone might have for a guy (or girl I guess) and use that as an example. And I am going to use "he" but you can think "she" depending on whatever haha

1. He has to be good with kids.
2. He has to love God more than he loves me.
3. He can't swear.
4. He has to be at least 5'8".
5. He has to be athletic.
6. He has to be generous.

Let's pretend for a minute that those were all of the things I said I wanted in a guy. (Some of those are true, some aren't, for the record.)  Which things would I really, honestly, hold to and not compromise on? Say I found a guy who was really sweet, athletic, good with kids, 5'9", and put God as his first priority, but he swore. He didn't see anything wrong with cussing every once in a while if he was upset. Would I let it slide because everything else about him was pretty good? Some of you reading this might think, "yeah of course you should just go out with him. I mean, swearing isn't all that bad, and if he loves God then it doesn't really matter." 

Okay I agree that that was a little dramatic, but my point is, if you set standards originally, you shouldn't let things that were important to you slip away just because you find someone that meets the majority of your principles. What if you meet someone who has all of the qualities in the above list except the height? Unless somehow height is absolutely 100% a deal breaker for you, that particular thing could probably be set aside. Do you see what i'm getting at? You need to decide now what standards you're going to hold your Prince Charming to, and which ones you might be comfortable giving up. But if you specify qualities that are either in the Bible, or that differentiate between right and wrong, you should decide now to stay firm on.  

What is going to be a make it or break it deal for you in a future relationship?

*I'm not sure if all of those sentences make sense; I am the queen of run-on sentences. You got the gist of it.*

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Let's Do an Exercise

I'm going to write yet another list, of just tons of qualifications you could have for a future boyfriend/girlfriend and I want you to pick out the ones that you would like them to have, and then I want you to choose the ones that they absolutely have to have, no question. If there are any that you think of in addition feel free to add them to your own list. I think everyone should have a list of wants and a list of needs per-say for their future partner. 

• Practices humility
• Is generous
• Is good with kids
• Loves God more than he loves you
• Is a good protector
• Diligent and hard working
• Doesn't swear
• Doesn't drink
• Sense of humor
• Is romantic
• Is taller than you
• Loves the outdoors
• Is 100% genuine and dedicated (that's rather vague...take it how you want)
• Keeps short accounts
• Doesn't push your boundaries
• Appreciates your high standards
• Gets along with your family
• Gets along with his family

Read over your list again. And again. You should have these things drilled into your brain so that if you find yourself getting interested in someone you can immediately see if they (I don't want to say "aren't good enough for you") but I mean that's basically what I mean. You don't want to date, and eventually marry, someone who holds completely different standards than you, and does things that you don't agree with. 

 

yes, yes I am tired of thinking

Sooooooo, to finish this for the night, I will overload you with cuteness and whatever else I come across on Google. Google is the best thing about computers. 

I never look that cute when I do it

I laughed harder than necessary at that

Poor guy. NOT

We've all done this. Be honest.

 

That's GORP you young kids

And that concludes what has been the longest post i've ever done. Just kidding, I have no idea if it was the longest. My guess is that it hasn't. It just seems like the longest because it took me like seven thousand hours to write...

W-what? No? Uh okay...

Sleep good. 

XO

I bet you don't know what a crouquembouche is :}

Some stuff just makes my day. There are actually lots and lots of things that have day-making potential in my mind. 

• When someone sends me a really sweet text at a totally random time, just to tell me how much they love me
• When I spontaneously get to hang out with someone and do fun stuff
• When I get any new makeup. Stop being judgmental people...I AM a girl after all
• When my absolute favorite songs come on the radio (This is How We Roll and Just the Way You Are)
• When random strangers compliment me
• When what is happening around me right now, happens. And that would be: two of my siblings and a good friend of ours who is super cool jamming out on three guitars in my family room :) 

It really brings a crazy amount of joy to my heart. It is very difficult to explain actually. I have an insane liking for the sound of acoustic guitar, especially open chords. *If you don't know what open chords are, you are missing out on some serious ear candy. (What does that even mean? I feel like it sounds inappropriate...heh heh)* Well, anyway Charlotte, so yeah. They're all teaching each other different songs and picking melodies, and singing, and it is so much fun to listen to. It's incredibly relaxing. I guess I can try to explain it by saying it makes my heart happy. You know the feeling...like when you hear or see or feel something that you just absolutely love and you just sigh...and are so comfortable. Yep that's it for me right here. (Partly because I stink at guitar and I am jealous of anyone who can play well, so I just love to hear other people play what I can't.) I think they would be weirded out to know that I'm writing about them as they're playing...I mean I probably would be. Just kidding, I don't think I would. I don't really know why I said that. *ahem* They are some cool kids let me tell you.

So what I was thinking about today is (can you use was and is in the same sentence? Whatever) JOY. What is joy? Where does it come from?  From whence does it come? How do you get it?

Supposed definition of joy

I mean I guess that is a pretty accurate definition right there, although I don't think I really agree on the first one in that list to be honest. I mean I think that is the definition of happiness, but joy, to me, is something different. Joy comes from God. From knowing that God is with you and protecting you and strengthening you, and because of that you don't have to worry about anything. Only then can you have joy. I mean, if you are considering your successes and good fortune, then yes. You will be happy. But somewhere in the back of your mind you will always have doubts about the future, longings, regrets, and things like that. So you can't be 100% full of joy. 

Where do you get joy?

You make known to me the path of life; you will fill me with joy in your presence, with eternal pleasures at your right hand. – Psalm 16:11

Umm I'd say that is a pretty easy answer. As long as you get the fact that the psalmist is talking about God here. We get joy from God. See that? Not from success, or people, or having a good breakfast. From God. Geez Google definitions, get it right. Sheesh.

yeah Google, sheesh

Ever heard this? The joy of the LORD is my strength 

Of course you have. Or have you been living under a rock? I don't know. Maybe you have. What am I even saying right now? Ugh so anyway, before I rudely interrupted myself, yeah so that's from the Bible. So it's obvs true. If you delight yourself in the Lord (He will give you the desires of your heart...and) He will give you joy. I feel like I say this in every single post I do, but what could be better than the Joy of the Lord? I have definitely used that phrase "what could be better than..." way too many times for it to be accurate. But you know what I mean. Pray for Joy. Ask God for Joy. Relish His Joy. Don't think constantly about all the crap in life, in your life, but choose Joy. It's so much better than choosing to have a pity party, or a worry fest or any of that junk.

Insert seamless topic transition here

On a much more interesting and fun note, my sister made me an insanely delicious and awesome dessert because we saw it on a cooking show and we (meaning she) had to try to re-create it! It is called a crouquembouche. Otherwise known as a cream puff tower. Cream puffs stuck together with caramel. I know. It is a real thing and it is a fantastic thing. 

I am sorry to say it didn't turn out looking too much like that picture...because our cream puffs somewhat sank down into not so puffy puffs...but the idea was the same. And she even successfully did the spun sugar on the outside that look like creepy-cool sugar cobwebs. Anyway, it was delicious and we only ended up with two injuries. *****do NOT under any circumstances, EVER touch hot caramel. You may end up with a 3rd degree burn in under 1 second.***** 


I am dead. I should be getting my second wind soon...but for now I am done here. Adios you cool kids you. (And adults???)

XO Charlotte

This did not end up as a very interesting post, but I promise that the next one will have lots more gifs and videos and cool junk like that. ( I have said junk twice in this post...I feel like that's a bad sign or something.) Okay really that's all. Goodnight.