I had another breakthrough moment a couple days ago. I hope you want to hear about it because regardless of whether you actually do or not...I'm going to tell you.
I know. Thanks.
I have realized that I no longer give a crap about people who hurt my feelings
I tend to be the kind of person who wants to talk to everyone, and talk a lot. I always have people who I feel compelled to call, and make sure are doing well. I always have people I miss talking to who I used to talk to all the time. There are a lot of people who I reach out to because I feel like at one point they would have wanted me to. Sometimes I don't realize that I go overboard. (Maybe none of this is going to make sense to you, but at least it's a story, right?) So what happens is, people who I try to care about don't always respond how I want them to. Which is, happily and thankful for my concern. (I literally make no sense as a human being.) Most of that, their negative reaction, is probably my fault, because it's definitely possible that I overstep my bounds and try to instigate conversations more often than I should. I've always had a problem with that. It isn't necessarily that I don't know when to stop, trying to talk to someone that is, it's that I don't want to. Or I feel like I can't somehow. I guess you could say that sometimes I get obsessive...I don't want to sound like any kind of creep because I'm not a creep I swear. I don't know how to explain it in a way that would make sense to anyone other than me...but I was talking to a couple of friends about it (thanks guys!) and both of them were telling me the same thing. It isn't worth getting upset over, when people say jerky things to me or when they ignore me. Because more people than you think do that to me.
I guess I just realized two things:
1. I don't need to constantly be the one to make sure everyone's okay. I'm not solely responsible for everyone else's happiness and well-being even though I feel like I am 24/7. That's just how I think.
2. I'm not obligated to give a crap about people when the treat me like...an old pair of shoes. Meaning that they don't use me unless they feel like they need to. How the crap is that fair to me?
My advice to you: If someone is annoying you tell them. Don't harbor it inside yourself. They need to know. I do. I need to know. Because I don't realize it myself. And I would also say, be aware of the fact that every single tiny thing you say, and ESPECIALLY what you DON'T say, affects people in some way. Whether it is positive or negative.
I'm feeling the Parks and Rec gifs today. Like so much. I think I'll continue from here basically using them exclusively.
| This is the male version of myself described to a 'T' |
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| This is a nugget of truth |
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| This is what I say every time I sit down to write something |
That's kinda it. I'm pooped. I've been up since 4am because I had the A-FREAKING-MAZING opportunity to help a beautiful, talented stylist do hair for a movie! It's the movie Night of the Living Dead, comedy version. You will probably never hear about it if not for me, but it is nonetheless cool. It's actually legit. And awesome. And now I am being requested, yet again, to do my sister's hair. Literally as we/I speak. Catch ya on the flip side
XO
Charlotte
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